What Men Need…But Don’t Know It!

  1. A 5000 square foot Georgian style home (my favorite)…or…
  2. A 1200 square foot plain old ordinary nothing to look at ranch house.

What if one of those homes was filled with squalor, vileness, rancid, gross, with vermin running rampant and was utterly repulsive? What if the other was comfy, cozy, fit like a glove, warm, inviting, and you could see yourself living there the rest of your life?

What if the Georgian you picked based on its outer appearance was the one that was vile and disgusting on the inside? Your friends would be impressed at the outer beauty of your home, but you would want to hide the ugliness of what was inside.

What if the ranch was the most inviting and comfortable home ever on the inside, but you didn’t feel much like showing it off to your friends, because compared to the Georgian, it wasn’t much to look at?   Your friends would miss out on the home’s true beauty.

If we asked men to describe their “ideal dream girl,” most of them would describe her in terms of outer/visual characteristics…such as eye color, hair color, tall or short, long slender legs or athletic muscular legs.

It is what is on the inside that truly matters.

It is the inside that takes the longest to develop.

It is the inside that is the functional aspect of the home in the illustration.

Consider John 14:16… “And I will pray the Father, and He shall give you another Comforter, that He may abide with you for ever.”

In this verse, the Holy Spirit is referred to as a Comforter.

Comforter in the Greek is called PARAKLETOS…meaning “called to one’s side”…indicating specifically the ability to give aid…or help…

Now consider Genesis 2:18… “And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.”

Here God is giving Adam a help…but not just any help…a help MEET for him. MEET in this verse means “value, worth, and befitting.” So in other words, God formed Eve to be a suitable helper…a valuable helper…a worthy helper.

Since Comforter (PARAKLETOS) and helper are derivatives, let’s look at some ministries of the Holy Spirit that ladies should adopt to be suitable helpers for their current mates…and future mates.

Let’s look at a list of ministries of the Holy Spirit and see if they aren’t what godly women should aspire to as wives or future wives.

 The Holy Spirit…

  1. Comforts (Acts 9:31): Here the word comfort is used in the context of consoling. Having compassion for your husband when he is down and in need emotionally, psychologically, and even spiritually is an ability God has given women to do.
  1. Convicts (John 16:8): Another word for convict is to reprove. The Holy Spirit convicts us in two ways. First, He alerts us that we are on the cusp of doing wrong in the hopes we will resist temptation. Also, He will make us feel godly sorrow when we have done wrong. In a loving way, a wife can help her husband avoid sin altogether or alert him to when he has done wrong…lovingly…
  1. Directs/Guides (John 16:13-14): Not only should wives reprove their husbands when necessary, but they should also finish the task by guiding their husband into doing right.  However, all your counsel to your husband must be founded upon the Word of God (John 17:17).
  1. Discerns (1st Corinthians 12:10): The Holy Spirit allows us to become keenly aware of things that God wants to show us…generally for our own good or the good of others.   Wives ought to walk closely with God so that through you, God can minister to your husband by making you keenly aware of what you husband needs from you at that particular moment in time.
  1. Empowers (Acts 1:8): Wives can be a builder or a destroyer. Wives can be the catalyst for their husbands to get things done.   Wives can motivate, push, urge, implore, and otherwise constrain their husbands to do what God asks them to do.
  1. Gives Joy (Romans 14:17): The Holy Spirit can help us to feel peace and happiness in the midst of trouble.   Wives have the responsibility, and the tools from God, to sometimes be the glue that holds it all together to help everyone else through a rough patch…without complaining. She is the opposite of the women spoken of in Proverbs 21:9 and Proverbs 25:24…that woman sucks all the joy out of being married to her.
  1. Restrains (Acts 16:6-7): When Paul and company wanted to do something that was against God’s Will, the Holy Spirit forbid them to do that. How much more, should a wife restrain her husband from doing wrong? She should stand firm against any desire he may have to include her in sin, and should stand strong and do all she can to protect him from himself if he so chooses to delve into sinful behaviors on his own.
  1. Unifies (Ephesians 4:3; Philippians 2:1-2): The Holy Spirit brings people together. Spiritual matters will find like-mindedness among believers when the Holy Spirit is involved. A wife should not seek to drive a wedge between she and her husband. Unless a man is doing wrong, she should follow her husband’s leadership in submission, seeking what it is God endeavors out of the relationship, and not her own agenda if she doesn’t like what’s going on. The Holy Spirit would not quarrel against God’s Will, and if your husband is following God’s direction, neither should the wife.
  1. Is a gift (Luke 11:13; Acts 2:38; Acts 8:18-20): For God to prepare a lady to desire her role and carry out these aforementioned ministries akin to the Holy Spirit’s ministries and then present her to her husband, makes her truly a gift…the way the Holy Spirit is a gift from God when we get saved.

Let’s close with these final thoughts…

Proverbs 18:22…men, there is someone God has chosen specifically suited to meet your needs…marrying the wrong one because you went looking on your own runs some real risks.

Ladies, if God presents you to a man, you are then a gift to that man and that man has been favored by God. God did a nice thing for that man, and that thing He did was give him YOU to be his helper…comforter…his Holy Spirit…his wife!

So…just like the Georgian home may be what a man may WANT…the average ranch house is more what that man NEEDS!

But God is so good, that the woman that has been chosen by God for that man, and has the characteristics of the Holy Spirit inside, looks even better than that Georgian house anyway. So the guy gets the best of both worlds…a woman he finds stunning on the outside and a women he finds equally stunning on the inside…one that he can see himself spending the rest of his life with.

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This entry was posted in Blessings, Character, Family, Godliness, Holy Spirit, Love, marriage, Ministry, Relationships, Spiritual Gifts, Spouse and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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